Have I Ever Mentioned I'm Part French Canadian?

When the Olympics rolls around every two years I am always a little sad at first that it isn't the other Olympics.

Oh, it's the winter Olympics?  Meh, I like the summer Olympics better.

After watching .005 seconds of competition, I change my tune.

OMG I LOVE THE WINTER OLYMPICS.

(In two years you can substitute "Summer" for "Winter", I do this for both).

The winter Olympics appeals to the Midwesterner in me.  Much like the majority of the athletes who participate in the winter Olympics, I am descended from a bunch of morons who decided that living in an area that is frozen solid for months at a time was a good idea.  (News Flash:  IT WAS NOT A GOOD IDEA.)  And yet despite the advent of many forms of transportation that could get us to warmer climates, we continue to live here.

 

But living in a completely uninhabitable climate is not enough for some people.  No.  They need to challenge Darwinism on multiple levels, so they take up truly idiotic sports like ski jumping, luge, skeleton, bobsled, moguls, and half pipe.  Cross-country skiing wasn't dangerous enough so they gave the skiers rifles and called it a biathlon, or they made them complete a ski-jump before they raced cross country and called it the Nordic combined.  Of course there are sports like ice dancing that look all pretty and gentle until you realize that the woman is allowing herself to be lifted up above the man's head while they are both hurtling across a very, very hard surface with blades strapped to their feet.  Who first thought that was a good idea?

 

So, in summation: winter Olympic athletes are not very bright, but DAMN if they aren't a lot of fun to watch.  These are my kind of people.